Should You Pay Kids for Chores? A Dad's Answer (and What We Do Instead)

By Tom · October 20, 2026 · 6 min read

Short answer: don't pay cash for everyday family chores like making the bed, feeding the pets or clearing the table. Those are part of living in the house. Tie them to screen time instead, and pay real money only for extra jobs that go beyond the basics, like washing the car.

Few parenting questions start a bigger argument than this one. Ask ten parents whether kids should be paid for chores and you'll get at least three answers. Here's ours, why we landed on it, and how to set it up in an afternoon.

The two camps

Camp 1: pay for work. Dave Ramsey argues kids should learn early that money comes from work. He tells parents to skip the word "allowance" and pay a "commission," only when the jobs are done (Fox Business, 2020).

Camp 2: keep money and chores separate. New York Times money columnist Ron Lieber takes the other side. On allowance and chores, he put it plainly: "We don't want to couple it to labor" (MPR News, 2013). His worry is practical: a kid who stops caring about money can simply opt out of chores.

Both camps make a fair point. Pay for everything and family chores become a gig your kid can turn down. Pay for nothing and "because I said so" has to carry the whole load.

What we do instead: chores earn screen time, extra jobs earn cash

In our house, the everyday chores aren't paid. You help because you live here. But they're not optional either, because the apps our kids care about stay locked until the day's chores are done.

That gives kids a reason that actually matters to them today, without turning the dishwasher into a job interview. Money is still on the table, just for work that goes beyond the basics.

Why screen time works as the reward

We have three dogs, a cat, three fish, two lizards and three gerbils. My kids love every one of them. But for a long time the phone always won, so the water bowls, the cages and the feeding ran on my reminders, every single day.

Once the apps stayed locked until every animal was fed and watered, the reminders stopped. Not because the kids suddenly loved scooping, but because the order of things became automatic: the work comes first, then the fun.

It also changed what "done" means. When a half-made bed doesn't count, the bed gets made properly. We've had more than one half-made bed and a pile of clothes stuffed out of sight get sent back until it was done right.

How to set it up this week

1. Write down the everyday chores. Keep it short, two to four per kid. Same chores, same order, every day. Kids push on rules that move.
2. Define "done" before the chore starts. "Clean your room" means nothing. "Clothes in the hamper, bed made, floor clear" means something.
3. Pick what unlocks. For most kids with a phone, that's the two or three apps they open first. Leave calls, texts and school apps alone.
4. Take yourself out of the checking. A photo of the finished job, a checklist on the fridge, a sibling inspector. Anything but you hovering and arguing.
5. Post a short list of paid extra jobs. Put a price next to each one so the negotiation happens once, not every Saturday.

Mistakes to avoid

• Paying for the basics. Once feeding the dog has a price, expect your kid to turn it down the week they don't need the money.
• Taking screens away as punishment. Framing matters. "You earned it" lands very differently from "you lost it," even when the rule is the same.
• Moving the goalposts. If the list changes every day, kids learn to wait you out.

Sources

• Fox Business: Why you should never tell a kid they're getting an 'allowance' (Dave Ramsey, 2020)
• MPR News: Are allowances good for kids? (Ron Lieber, 2013)
• ChoreScroll Blog: 82% of us did chores as kids. Only 28% ask our kids to.